Scattered Updates

So much going on, and I'm feeling a little overwhelmed.

I haven't published anything for a few weeks, but not because I haven't been writing. Several posts are in varying stages of completeness, but something always seems to usurp my attention, demanding to take precedence, and I'm off to write about that topic -- determined, of course, to resume the abandoned post, but usually return to find the material to have become outdated in the interim. It's a vicious cycle.

So, I've decided to abandon form and structure and fire off a rather superficial list of all that has been keeping me up at night.

My last day of physical therapy was Friday, January 30 (though I missed that day due to van crappery so, technically, it was Tuesday, February 3).  The idea of stopping PT at KKI and beginning my home program has me rather despondent.  Being very much a creature of habit, it's unsettling when large parts of my day are removed.

My course of treatment for PT had been extended three times because I was doing so well.  First, I was due to end PT after eight weeks, on October 23, but I was doing so well and making so much progress that the date was extended to December 5, then again to January 30.  As Cara told me when I began therapy in July, "No one stays in therapy forever."  Still, I can't help but feel as if I've failed somehow -- failed to make progress significant enough to warrant another extension.  I feel as if I have disappointed -- likely because I, myself, am disappointed.

Mostly, I will miss working with Cara.  In addition to being the consummate therapist -- always encouraging, understanding, and full of great advice -- she has helped me achieve not only impossible improvements in my physical ability, but also a better understanding of myself and my disability.  I'd say she's as empathetic as anyone could be without actually being in a chair (a distinction I'm willing to grant very few people -- so far, only Rich has qualified).  I truly enjoy her company, and am lucky to have had her as a therapist when I embarked on this endeavor -- I am certain I would not have seen this degree of success without her.  Plus, she gets my nerdy, wry, snarky sense of humor and bravely fields the deluge of questions I come armed with to every therapy session -- who could ask for more?

My OT has been extended, and will continue through February 28.  I'm relieved I will still have the opportunity to work on reviving arm function with Kristin and Mike, and use the FES biking equipment before therapy.

I had another reevaluation with Dr. Becker on February 3, but I'm afraid it didn't go as well as I expected.  I'm certain my ASIA score will be lower on the pin-prick segment, though I'm not sure why.

My spasticity has gotten completely out of control, and it's become an impedance on my daily life. I'm causing damage to myself and my surroundings because my left arm becomes uncontrollable and hits my hand drive, so I run into things but can't stop myself.*  It's very frustrating. We've tried switching medications (to Zanaflex), and upping the dose of the medication (Baclofen) that I'm currently on, all to no avail. The increase in the strength of my spasticity could be attributed to stronger muscles from the work I've been doing in therapy, but Dr. Becker suspects a spinal cyst could be the cause.  An MRI will determine whether that is indeed the case.  If it's not, I'm afraid I'll be relegated to a more aggressive method of addressing the spasticity issue than oral Baclofen.

After a DEXA scan, I've been diagnosed with osteoporosis.  It's common amongst SCIs, and thus expected I'd have it, but that doesn't make it suck any less.  Medication and continued therapeutic activity won't return my bones to proper density, but should help improve the density and prevent fractures.

In other news, I've finally gotten a replacement for my 1991 Ford van -- a comparably small minivan that is just great!  It's novel to have a vehicle with, among other things, a working dashboard clock.

And, finally, my apartment is ready!  I move in on Thursday, February 12.  Yay!

There's a brief run-down of all that which has been occupying my time and my mind.  These topics will all be revisited in greater depth in forthcoming posts.


* In fact, as I was typing this, I had a bad spasm and knocked over my desk, for the 11th time this week.